This Is The Story Of How Kerrie Met Her Sperm Donor Dad
The Beginning Of Kerrie’s Story
Think back to your 13th birthday. You’re finished school for the day and running towards the gates.
You approach your mum as you always do before spotting your dad across the way – with a birthday card in hand.
Then the biggest piece of news in your life is dropped on you.
We need to have a chat because he is not really your dad…
For Kerrie it was similar circumstances that led her to the realisation that she was born as the result of donor sperm.
The man that she thought was her dad was unable to bare more children so they opted for a donor, but by the time she was 13 the pair had separated and there was little contact between her and her father.
And while the news was first met with confusion and an urge to ignore the bombshell and pretend it doesn’t exist, she has now come to terms with it (for most part).
Born in 1981 in Queensland, Kerrie was conceived in the early stages of donor practices in the state.
LISTEN TO KERRIE'S
Kerrie’s Meeting With The Fertility Doctor And Meeting Her Donor
When she was in her early 30s Kerrie decided she wanted to meet her biological father.
But the Queensland laws still state that any donor sperm submitted before a certain year must remain anonymous.
“My doctor - the doctor that my parents used - he told me, when I had a bit of an interview with him a few years ago that they would get a good sample and they would keep the cup on the table to use for a number of women throughout that morning,” Kerrie said.
“Four doctors were working out of the private rooms, [they] would use one sample – apparently, my donor had a fantastic sample.”
Kerrie used DNA and the brilliance that Is science to narrow down her potential father.
“I am 98% sure that I have found my donor – I did a DNA test and worked through my closest DNA match which was a fourth cousin.
“I used that to basically triangulate where I fit into a [family] tree and there were two potential options, an uncle and a nephew and it was the uncle and I just called him.
“I was cooking eggs in my kitchen and decided to call him – I’d waited 23 years and I never thought I’d find him… he was incredibly receptive… he said ‘oh my goodness, how are you darling’.
“My donor estimates that he donated once to twice a week for five years – so if you work out a conservative estimate you’re looking at 30 to 200 children.
Meeting The Donor Father, Dig
We spoke to Dig, the man who is 98% likely to be Kerrie’s biological father tp find out why he donated and if he ever wanted to be contacted by any offspring who were the product of his donations.
“I was actually doing a project researching the vitamin c content of sperm and during that process I was approached and asked if I would be interested being a sperm donor,” Dig said.
He drew on his family’s own experience, his brother had struggled to conceive naturally and used artificial insemination in an attempt to fall pregnant.
So Dig decided, if it was to help a family who want to be parents, then what does he have to lose.
On top of his student wages (which didn’t amount to much) he also received $20 a donation.
“The good thing about it was that I was able to help some people,” he said
Among his friends at medical school, he decided that the appropriate term for himself was as a professional wanker.
Years on and he always came back to one quote that he would send out to the world and his possible biological children.
“Well I hope your genes have served you well and I hope you’re happy.”
“I wasn’t at all alarmed when Kerrie rang… it was rather an amazing and joyous occasion.
“There’s a very, very bright and intelligent woman there that I’m delighted to see, there’s a woman there that has amazing determination which is another feature of my family line.
“And she’s just turned out to be a really lovely lady so I am really happy to have her chase me down, find me and say g’day.“
The Result: Is He The Father?
Of course we had to find out – is Dig the father of Kerrie?
They seem like a perfect match.
She has his eyes, intelligence and determination after all!
Whether they form a bond or just touch base to discuss medical history and to get a better understanding of who they really are, we’re excited to find out.
A RESOUNDING YES
99.9996% chance that Dig is Kerrie’s father.
“We were pretty confident anyway… and when we met we pretty much knew within a few minutes that there were too many similarities to ignore,” Kerrie said.
“It’s not instant dad, it’s not that kind of relationship, we’re working on getting to know each other… whatever form that takes we’re happy to roll with it and see where it takes us.
“This has been such a positive experience for both of us… he’s just so happy that I found him and he gets to know who I am.”
Dig was just as chuffed.
From the first moment he met her, he immediately thought she looked just like his sister Hilda.
“That was probably the most amazing thing, is the physiological depth that it’s affected me,” he said.